Another week gone and not a damn thing done with it. Other than managing to survive to the weekend not much happened. Thank goodness that I made it through and that I now have a nice long week off. I think that is what is going to save my sanity - that and knowing that there are only two more months at this job to get through. If I can survive that, I can survive anything!
I'm not into week 20. The progesterone poisoning is still continuing, though not as bad as it could be I suppose. It just means up and downs with stomach discomforts and sometimes food agreeing with me and sometimes it not. It has a mind of its own these days. But I am feeling the baby move a lot more often which is reassuring!
Of course, now I am having to face some of the moodiness that I have been going through lately. I'm have been so pissy about everything and the fact that I'm so tired and ill a lot of the time makes me even more pissy and bitchy some days. I know I'm taking it out on people who certainly don't deserve it, but I don't mean to do that! It seems to happen all of its own accord. I wish I had a switch for happiness and politeness but things don't seem to work that way....
I just hope people forgive me when my moodiness gets the better of me and realise its just hormones. It has nothing to do with anything in particular or anything that they did. Thank goodness my husband has finally figured that out! Otherwise the marriage could be in a lot worse places! God knows I love him more than anything these days....
March is Officially Over!!
Saturday, March 23, 2002
08:46 a.m.
Well, maybe not in the calendar sense, but in my little world, I'm ready for it to be over!! Maybe that's not fair to the rest of the world, but personally I think it could certainly be ended! There isn't any need to continue on with the whole sham of this month.
I would rather move on since the month has had nothing but bad luck and icky icky weather. Winter has descended this area even though spring has is supposed to be coming - heck the first day of spring has come and gone and it's still below freezing! We've had more snow this month than the whole of the rest of the winter. It's been a month of struggling with a car that hates winter, trying to restrain myself from the exurtion of shoveling. My poor husband has shoveled more than his fair share, but being five months pregnant does not really preclude the chance to pick up a shovel and dig myself out! Bad enough to get my car stuck.....
And then there is this whole accident prone thing.
It started with slipping on the ice at the car dealership. I hit my knee against the side of the car, but my foot managed to keep going. That bent my knee backwards and meant a trip to Urgent Care the next day. The doctor thinks that I tore the cartilage that cushions between the two leg bones. Oh joy. Unfortantely it means that I spent one whole day sitting on the couch nursing the knee and compounding it with an aching hip and sciatic nerve. Joy upon joy....
And things go downhill from there....
This week I did the ultimate. I slipped and fell on the concrete sidewalk outside of work. I fell really hard and got up - even though shaken - and managed to get myself home. But by the time I had managed to get home, the stomach muscles had tightened and my lower abdomen ached like crazy. The doctor's nurse told me I should head for the hospital and get checked out. I spent (with my poor husband) 6 hours at the hospital from being admitted to the 4 hours of monitoring, it made for a long night. The long and the short of it was that I didn't have anything more than a scare about the fall. No contractions and the baby was rocking and rolling and having a good time all on their own. It made for a very long week.
And of course then there's the frustration of work, but I don't need to go into that.....
So between the doctor visits and the fact that I have a great visitor coming in April plus a weeks vacation from work and a con I'm looking forward to, I'm completely done with March!
Who's with me?!
Another Day, Another Dollar
Saturday, March 9, 2002
10:44 p.m.
I'm tired. BUt then it's after 10pm so of course I am. It seems these days that I spend more time sleeping than doing anything worthwhile. It wouldn't be so bad I suppose if I could sleep on my stomach without feeling like there's this big lump in my way!
Alright, so I suppose I shouldn't call my future child a lump, but that's what it feels like. I'm begrudging it ever minute of pain and interuppted sleep already! That and the things that being pregnant is already restricting from me.
Like clothing choices. I spent last weekend eliminating all the things from my wardrobe that I couldn't conceivable wear in the next year while I am pregnant and then losing all the weight I gain while pregnant. It was depressing to look at the 5 garments left in the closet (this includes the maternity clothes I broke down and bought) and realize that was what I was confined to wearing for the rest of this.... ordeal.
So maybe ordeal is the wrong word, but I hate feeling like my options are suddenly being so limited. Everything from clothes to my inability to help my husband out by shoveling snow is frustrating at times. I just want a chance to be myself again.
But I suppose I traded that in for mommy-hood instead.
In the end, it is going to all be worth it. When I'm holding my child, I know that all I will be concerned with is how much I love this piece of myself and my husband. In the meantime, I just have to get through all the rest of the annoying aches and pains and limitations.
That and maybe I can start convincing people that I'm not answering the question 'How are you feeling?' unless they start paying a dollar up front for such information. THink about it - I could have the child's college education paid for by the end of another month of pregnancy! Sounds like a definite plan....
~~ My Space ~~